You're just minding your own business when you make a stop at Coborn's to get a few things for dinner. You don't want to chance getting too much stuff to carry, so you grab a cart on your way in. It immediately starts misbehaving like an overstimulated/undernapped toddler, and the problem can be traced to ONE wheel that's gone rogue. Why dost thou Corborn's forsaken...uh, thou?

It's not's US.

Why One Wheel on Your Shopping Cart Is Always Broken

Perhaps you're so perceptive that you've noticed how the carts at Target never do this to you. Why is that?

Is it because retailers are conspiring against YOU, and know that a wonky cart will slow you down, giving more face time to their product, and thus tricking you into buying more?

No. Probably.

Shopping carts are like indoor pets who are forced to go outdoors: they're not really built for it, and they're not going to put up with this crap for long.

Carts aren't exactly the most ruggedly-built things, and parking lots aren't exactly smooth like butter; they'd be pretty dang slippery when wet, which could set a business up for lawsuits.

All of that pushing carts over rough terrain wreaks havoc on the wheels. It's not a case where if one wheel goes bad, they're all replaced (like car tires if the other 3 are close to the end of their usefulness), because that wouldn't be cost-effective. The wheels are replaced (eventually) as they go bad.

D'ya know what else ruins a shopping cart's wheels besides rough parking lots?


Photo by Karsten Winegeart on Unsplash
LOL property damage! (Photo by Karsten Winegeart on Unsplash)

If social media has taught me anything (besides OUTRAGE ALL OF THE TIME), it's that women love to plunk themselves into shopping carts. Sorry Gregina: they're not meant for that.

This is why we cant have nice things Photo by Dave Goudreau on Unsplash)
This is why we can't have nice things (Photo by Dave Goudreau on Unsplash)

I just want a working cart for when I'm traversing through Home Depot, and gals like those pictured above have abused the Privilege of Carts. GET OFF MY PARKING LOT LAWN.

Another perfectly good cart wrecked for social media clicks Photo by Joshua Rawson-Harris on Unsplash)
Another perfectly good cart wrecked for social media clicks Photo by Joshua Rawson-Harris on Unsplash)

See the pic above? Do you also see a grocery store? No, you don't. Somehow, posing with a shopping cart in a parking lot is considered "no cap" or whatever.

I'm calling for social media influencers to be permanently banned from coming within 9 feet of a shopping cart. It's for the good of society.

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