It's not alcoholism if you're being festive and precise with your beer selection. Right?

Because we need all the help we can get, Uproxx has been kind enough to let us know when to drink certain beers throughout the Thanksgiving day...or, which beers to drink during each 'stage' of Thanksgiving. Without further ado...


WHAT TO DRINK WHEN, ON THANKSGIVING

STAGE ONE: THE GAME
What to drink: a pilsner

You'll want something that goes down easy to kickoff...well, kickoff. A pilsner is light and easy to drink. A good start. I'll still dive head-first into a stout, but that's me...

STAGE TWO: THE FIRST COURSE
What to drink: an IPA

Who actually goes through courses when they eat? It's a feast, therefor all the food (perhaps save for the pies) is out there to mow down right away. I hate IPAs, anyway.

STAGE THREE: TURKEY TIME
What to drink: a saison

A saison is light, yet packs a punch. When you're scarfing down food, wash it down with a saison.

STAGE FOUR: BREAK TIME
What to drink: water

Hydration is key to lasting all day. It also helps you avoid getting cranky.

STAGE FIVE: SECONDS
What to drink: a winter ale

One plate will never do. The second your blood sugar crashes, it's time to reload! Wash down the next round with a winter ale.

STAGE SIX: 3.14159 TIME
What to drink: an imperial stout

Imperial stouts are strong, with a hint of chocolate and coffee. Perfect for pie time!

STAGE SEVEN: WUDERYALOOKINAT?!
What to drink: anything Irish

You're drunk, pissed, and ready to rumble. Might as well introduce a new stereotype to Thanksgiving stereotypes and drink Irish brews with getting and receiving bruises.

Happy Thanksgiving!

H/T: Uproxx